What happens when you throw a blue rock into red water? It gets wet...

whats worse that finding your having sex with your long lost sister? having sex with your long lost brother

Why can't you get a pterodactyl use the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

People thought hitler said "I want to burn the jews" he really said "I want a glass of juice".

So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask him to lower the volume a bit and maybe also play a quieter tune.

What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizzz

What is the different on a black guy and a bicycle ? The black guy steals the bicycle, but the bicycle dont steal the black guy. Yes, my bike got stolen ...

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has AIDS.

How does a Welshman take a shit? Like anyone other human being does.

How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

There are a fox and a chicken and the fox eats the chicken.

What's the color of the sky when an airplane takes off? Blue. What are you, stupid?

Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

Committing Suicide #YOLO

There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette on an island. This island is called England, and this situation tends to happen a lot.

When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

What did Stevie Wonders wife do when they got into fights? Re-Arrange the furniture

Why was the 13 year old drug addict crying? Because somebody shot him in the foot

What poops,smells bad,burps,wears diapers,farts,and screams spank me with a bib on That Depends what you do on saturday nights

Knock Knock! Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim your cousin. Kathy then let Jim inside her house and helped him carry the pizza boxes into the kitchen. Everyone had fun and enjoyed the party very much that night.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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