What do you call a blonde that just got hit by a school bus? Dead.

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--- ___________________--- Can you tell what it is? Yes... Then what is it? Its a blanket,duh! ......

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

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What happened to the boy after his life saving surgery? He died of an unrelated disease.

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How do you get an Orphan's hands to bleed? Tell them to clap till daddy gets home.

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catastrophic anthropogenic global warming

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

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Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

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What was the asian person's name? I don't know, I never met him.

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Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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Do Your Homework: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Get An Award At School: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Figure How To Adjust The Zoom On Your Computer: Mum & Dad - WOW HOW DO YOU KNOW SO MUCH, YOU'RE SO CLEVER, WHO TAUGHT YOU THIS?! Typical ...

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Q: What's grey and can't climb trees A: A car park

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what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

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I saw 2 jews talking. I threw in a penny and watched them fight to the death. I did the same with 2 catholic preasts exept I threw in a baby boy

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Whats blue, green and red, and runs trough the strees each sunday? ...What? I have no idea, I was hoping you did.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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What does Steven Hawking and Justin Bieber have in common? Absolutely nothing.

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What's blue, red, and full of metal? Timmy in his favorite blue sweater, after he got hit by a truck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops