What's brown and sticky A stick

What does a blonde's pussy taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage.

Hey Shea

Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

You Scream, I Scream, The cops come, It's awkward

A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

What do you call a person who drinks beer a lot? Alcohol abuser.

What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

Knock, Knock! Go away!

Boys have swag, real men have class

A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the chicken!

Q: What do sleeping pills and coffee have in common? A: Absolutely nothing

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar mans asks ''so, what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk.

God is like semen. They're both nouns.

Q: How do you starve a Black family? A: By not giving any Food.

Why was the pig sweating? It wasnt, because pigs have adapted by using behavioral thermoregulation, which is the act of cooling themselves in the mud or water.

What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

What do you call white trash Garbage

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...