How many bears does it take to screw in a light bulb? None; it’s a fairly menial task requiring little more than a single human hand. Requisitioning any number of bears for the effort would be an extremely dangerous “Rube Goldberg”-esque solution to simple problem.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock? Who's there? Not Mary.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse answers, "Because I'm an alcoholic."

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

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whats brown and has a head? A: my penis

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Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? Vegeta got rid of the scouter because a monocle built for displaying a person's physical abilities in numbers is extremely farfetched and he didn't want to be a part of a super race of supreme beings that still relied on such ridiculous antics

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roses are red violets are blue corey mills is and got raped by you

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How do you know when you have had too much to drink? When you ran over 7 pedestrians and are lying in the back of a police vehicle

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Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

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What did Wonder Woman say to Superman? I'm wonder woman.

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? Neither has he.

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A boy and a girl are each granted a wish Girl: I want us to be lovers until the end of the world Boy: I want the world to end

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What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? This joke.

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roses are red violets are blue i've got alzheimer's ...

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What is big has a red nose and is funny Don't ask me I have never been out of my house

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What happened to the man who lost his job? He couldn't support his family so they all became homeless and eventually died of starvation.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

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Why doesn't Caillou have hair? Because he has cancer.

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Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

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What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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Q. What time is your appointment with the Chinese dentist? A. 20 past 4

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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