How do you double any amount of cash? Stack it up and fold it in half.

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Misner is a twat.

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How does your sister ride a bicycle? My sister does not have any legs.

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Your mom came to my house last night. We played chess.

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Why did the weird alien jump everywhere? You probably don't want to know. If you learned why it jumped everywhere,you probably would make fun of it. I don't know if you know this, but aliens are sensitive. If you made fun of him, you probably would create World War 3:Humans VS Aliens.

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Know whats worse than a worm in your apple? Getting fridges thrown at you.

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A horse walks into a barn.. The farmer says "why the long face?",This frightens the horse ultimately leads to the farmer getting kicked in the teeth

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What is small, slimy, and thrown in the garbage? A stillborn

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Roses are potatoes Violets are potatoes I like potatoes Potatoes.

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What do you call a man with no arms? Richard, as that is his name.

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My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, I have a retinal hemorrhage

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

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What do you call white trash Garbage

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What is red and has two legs? Half a cat.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A guy in mud.

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Why Was the straight man in love ? because he was an intelligent human being who had the formula of understanding woman .

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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Why did Little Suzie fall off her bike? I hit her with a shovel. Why did little Suzie die? I hit her with a shovel and she fell off her bike.

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Why couldn't the black man be an astronaut? He was not qualified for the Job

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Why did the atheist start snoring in his sleep? He has a naturally small airway and fairly large tonsils.

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What city likes baseball the most? New York

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops