whats red bubbly and looks out of a windo? a baby in a mocrowave

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What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both live underground apart from the eagle.

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Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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how do you stop a rhino from charging? you shoot it with a gun until it's either dead or no longer charging at you because thats a highly dangerous situation.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get ran over.

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

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Do you have ass-thma? Coz your ass is taking my breath away

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What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

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what did the African baby get for his birthday?..... AIDS

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Why did the Mexican mow lawns? He needed money to pay for his college tuition.

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alex is cool

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How did baby Bobby spend his summer vacation? He didn't, he died from heat exhaustion.

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I would like a rum and............ Coke." The bartender asks, curiously, "What's up with the big pause?" The bear looks down at his paws, embarrassed, and mumbles under his breath, "social anxiety."

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What happened to the kid who brome his neck? He died.

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[] [] Those are eyes These are teeth

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Q. What did the mom say to the boy scout? A. He wouldn't be a happy camper.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a penis and a knife choose which one goes in you.

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What smells like death and makes kids cry? Dead animal

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Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither did she.

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Why was the black man good at basketball? Because he practiced.

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Why couldn't the boy watch the R-rated movie? Cuz he was blind.

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Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes? A: Fsh

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knock knock who's there aids aids who ... dumb ass

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops