Why did Sally dance and record it on Vine? She did it for the Vine

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What's difficult and tedious to do? Trying to find a joke with 0 thumbs up/down -Sykes

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How do you stop a car from crashing into a wall? -You can't, you are welcome to try, but please don't.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

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Q: Why is little Timmy living without his parents? A: He is ninety seven years old!

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Women age like a fine wine: sediment develops as they lose their tannins, and earthy notes of oak and mineral develop in their flavor profile, giving them a lengthened finish.

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Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad this joke is over?

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Yo mamma so poor she got a job.

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how many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A shitload! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair.)

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roses are red violets are blue most poems rhyme but this one doesnt

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LOL

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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suzy took a bath with bubbles what?......... I'm sure bubbles is a nice guy

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How can you tell your not italian? You aint no Guito!

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What say the mirror if i look in it,? He died

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Why did this website get run into the dirt? Because you they let idiots like me post whatever I want. _CamelJocky

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I have a great knock knock joke. You start. Go.

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What do you get if you throw a banana at the wall? Nothing.

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A german walks into a London Pub. He turns to the man on his left and says, " Hallo Kolleginnen und dort bar Mäzen. Ich bin gespannt zu sehen, ob wir eine Beziehung herzustellen, wie ich gesucht Gespräch, als ich in der wunderbaren Kultur, die London zu bieten hat. Ist das in Ordnung mit dir? Heil Hitler"

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What do you do when its night time and you go downstairs and see your tv floating in the air? you say PUT IT DOWN N I G E R

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whats the difference between an iron and a priest? An iron is a hand-held device which presses clothes and a priest is a person who is authorized to perform the sacred rituals of a religion.

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A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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