What do you give hobos? Febreeze

What did the dyslexic boy get for Christmas? A laptop. And he was very happy.

A man walks into a bar

What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he needed to go to work to help pay for his dying daughter's cancer treatment

Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

Why the girl have a crooked leg? Her grandma thought that she was a pretzel and while the girl was sleeping the grandma tried to bend the girls leg into a pretzel shape

'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

A black man, a small child, and a priest were all standing in line. They were all checking in the hospital after being in a 3 car pileup

s s is for shit h h is for hit i i is for it t t is turtle

How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks why the long face? The horse, unable to comprehend human speech, promptly craps on the floor and leaves.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't cross it. He was pushed.

Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

Next season on teen moms, Justin Bieber tells her story.

Remember IRON MAN 3! Subscribe to www.prettypleasehelpmeforgethatpieceofshitmovie.com

Once soon a time there was a boy named steven. He dropped his ice cream because... You know the rest

My diick won't stop barking unless I take it for a walk, problem is, I can't find a leash big enough

What would Micheal Jackson do if he were alive today? THRILLER! THRILLER! THRILLERS NIGHT!

What do you call a horny horse? A unicorn.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Q- what the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? A- The Wheelchair

What do you call a cow who can't produce milk? Utter failure.

What is Alqueida's favorite football team? The New York Jets.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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