Why is it irrelevant whether someone is a twat or not? Love your neighbour.

The black man at the narcotics anonymous meeting said, "oh, this isn't bingo is it?" then walked out of the room feeling mildly embarassed.

Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

What do you call a banana in a blender? A banana in a blender. Duh

What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

Terry's penis oh wait! what penis But I'm not a rapper

Women's rights

Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

Romeo and Juliet both die at the end of the book. HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHA i just screwed you guys over.

On the dora show when they asked where the Monster was why did the arrow point left instead of right?? Because it was scared

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being the worm.

How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

What's long, hard and full of semen? A penis

Why did Mr. Moseley choose to not buy crest toothpaste this month? Because your daughter got an abortion.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage?

Jesus walks on water Chuck Norris swims through land

If you add two 1's together its 11 if you add two 2's together its 22 If you add two 3's together its 33 So what happens if you add 4 and 4? No you dumb-ass its not 44, its 8

Q. What's the definition of mixed emotions? A. Watching your attorney drive off a cliff in your new car.

what is red and bad for your teeth? a brick

I was raped oh no he's coming HELP ahhhhhhhhfkaek.k.k.k.k.k.k. vmruieao3 vxm v

How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

Click here for free sandwich.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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