A horse walks into a bar and asks the bartender "why the long face?" The bartender replies "this is the fourth time this week a horse walked into my bar and every time it happened i have to clean up a bunch of horse pooh!"

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Why did the man think inside of the box? Because he was inside of the box.

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What did the doctor tell his patient? Unfortunately you have cancer.

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What's good about having alzheimers? You meet new people every day!

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What would Helen Keller say to Obama? Wow Im really impressed that you are our nation's first black president. You're doing a great job. Except it would come out like DUUUUURNNNNNAFMKAAAALLLL

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

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Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with men other than her husband.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? *snicker* F*ck a duck.

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Why did the girl need a peice of gum after spending 20 minutes parked in the truck with her boyfriend? Because she had spent the last 20 minutes eating sweets, which she couldnt let her mom know she had eaten because her mom calls her fat everyday even though she only weighs 110 pounds, and forces her to only eat vegetables.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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What's more disturbing than finding an apple in your worm? The fact that you're eating a worm.

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Q.Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? A.One is a human and the other is an inanimate object used to give people a rest.

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your mama so old, shes dead.

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What did the toy cowboy say to the man? Nothing, toys can't talk.

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How many dogs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Dogs don't have thumbs.

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Why was the black man out of a job? because he was recently laid off and had not found any job offerings that he would be interested in

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How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles

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What do fat people and shinease people have in common? They both have a lot of chins.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Paki? Nothing, they're both as bad as each other.

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did Michael Jackson touch children ? yes of course. otherwise he would have been an absolutely terrible father

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whats the best thing about life? whatever the best thing about life happens to be!

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Why is Joe is ugly? I dont Know

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What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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How do you kill a pirate? Throw him of a bridge

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops