Why did they bury the fireman on the east side of the green grassy hill, to the left of the old well, underneath the huge apple tree? Because he was dead.

What is worse then losing your remote? Falling off a cliff landing on a sharp rock and dying slowly.

Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

Why did the homeless man decide it was time to get off the streets? He wanted to save face.

What's worse than shitting whilst fucking? Losing your eye! Kelvin Yang

What did the twin towers order from the pizzeria? Two large Plane

Why are blondes so dumb? They aren't dumb they just have prejudice against them

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

How many plumbers does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Plumbers don't do that. Electricians do.

An American, a Canadian, and a Scottish man died in a horrible car accident. Their story was used as a lesson to keep teenagers from drunk driving.

Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

What's black and fast? A treadmill.

A bar walks into Chuck Norris.

How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

What's the difference between heaven and hell? Hell likes you more.

Y did the boy fall down the stairs???? He was In a wheel chair

A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

why was the cat black it was a black cat

Photons have mass? i didn't even know they were catholic.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

Why did the teenager take a shower? Because she was brutally raped by a serial rapist and felt dirty. Unfortunately for her, she was unaware that she was washing off the prints from her body and the rapist was never found

Why does fowlerville suck cause everyone wishes they were black

Q: What do the Gynecologist and the pizza delivery man have in common? A: They both get to smell the goods but neither one of them can eat it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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