I've got some good news an some bad news. The good new is that you just won 10 million dollars! The bad news is I'm just kidding.

Q: What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? A: Getting your face smashed with a hammer.

What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

A seal walks into a club.

When life gives you lemons you squirt them in someones eyes and steal what life gave them.

Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

How many polish people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one. The polish are a civilized and prosperous country.

If the best things in life are free, whats the hardest things in life? Death.

Why doesn't a chicken wear pants? Because, there are no tailors in the area who make pants suitable for chickens to wear.

A drunk guy walks into a car

An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

What do you call two Muslims flying an airplane? Pilots

Why did the balck man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

Little Birdy: Are you my mother? Man: No, I'm a murderer. Get in the truck.

Roses are red Violets are blue Call the cops girl They can't unrape you

What did one traffic light say to the other? Nothing, as traffic lights are incapable of thought as they are not living.

What do you call a black man eating dessert? A man of African ancestry enjoying a sweet treat.

Roses are red Violets are blue I was diagnosed as criminally insane Wanna be my friend?

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

an elephant is like a guy but its nose is the di**

Which disney princess always stays old? Snow White

How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...