21 Ways to Annoy Everybody 1) Pretend to be one of the Bush family. Doesn't matter which. 2) Have an uncontrollable lusting for someone else every five minutes. 3) Pretend to be from different ethnic backgrounds every hour, and when people ask you about it, answer like a hillbilly would. 4) Act like a hillbilly. Period. 5) Improvise Italian operas. 6) Gossip about someone to their face. 7) Answer every question with a question. 8) Repeat yourself constantly. 9) Act like a member of the opposite sex. 10) Repeat yourself constantly. 11) Act like Mr. Flanders from The Simpsons. 12) Repeat yourself constantly. 13) Change what you repeat every now and then. 14) Use homonyms in your e-male that the spell cheque would knot sea as miss steaks. 15) Change what you repeat every now and then. 16) Talk to someone while looking at somebody else. 17) Employ in your casual banter extensive vocabulary that will befuddle thy contemporaries. 18) Change what you repeat every now and then. 19) One word: Caffeine. 20) Another word or two: Caffeine and Sugar. 21) stringwhateveryousayintoonelongwordsoitshardtomakeoutwhatyou'resaying.

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Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

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What do you call a gynochologist named John? John

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How do you stop your golf ball from hitting a goose? You dont.

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Q: Knock knock Q: Who's there? A: Not Suzie

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i need teepee for my bunghole! jlr

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A little boy went to a sleep over . They watched a episode of pokemon and the flashing lights triggered the boys epilepsy he was driven to hospital and is recovered.

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What's black and runs fast? Newsflash: Most of you are racist.

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"Hey have you seen Stevie wonders car. Neither has he.

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what`s green and flys a plain i was kidding about the green

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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A devout Islamic man walks into a weapons of mass destruction store he is shocked and appalled at how easily such dangerous weapons can be bought.

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I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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Why do people carry around spoons? Because they like to do them

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69

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Why? Why not?

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Two reporters walk into Tah rir Square. Both are abused and that's sad.

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How do you stop a friendly bear from bouncing up and down on your front lawn? Shoot it in the neck.

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why did the small boy drop his ice cream ? because he has no hands

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Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What did the black basketball player say to the white basketball player when he lost? Good game.

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How do you help a black person find a job ? Tell them places that are hiring.

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How many children does it take to kill a homocidal killer? None. Children should not attempt such a dangerous task.

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And so the baseball says to the tractor........ Your not my dad

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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