Why would a baby cry? Because it's being put through a juicer.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. And that's when I found out my Uncle Ted was a cross-dresser.

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A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS.

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You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

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What did the murderer do to the dentist? Nothing, the murderer has served his time and is clean. But he did get his teeth cleaned.

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A girl asks a guy are you finish. The guy says no I'm British.

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What's worse than having a worm in your apple? 2012.

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What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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jibby jobby

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What do you call a person with no arms or legs rolling around in leaves? I don't know that seems like a highly improbable situation

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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If I had a nickel for everyday I lived...... I would get a nickel a day

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What happened when the wife refused to make her husband a sandwich? Since he was paralyzed from the neck down, he starved to death.

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Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

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How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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roses are red violets should be purple

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability

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what's worse then the holocaust finding a worm in your apple.

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whats long, hard and full of seamen submarine

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Q: What do you call a drunk man driving a Corvette with no arms, no legs and a missing eye? A: A severely impaired driver

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What did Tiger Woods say when his wife hit him with a golf club? "Why did you hit me with a golf club".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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