How do you starve a zombie? You dont, they are allready dead.

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Your mama's so skinny; she can fit into most swimsuits sizes 4-6 and has a rather petite bottom.

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Why did'nt the puppy eat it's food? Because it was made up of little bits and peices of it's family.

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What do you call a drunk, blind, deaf monkey driving a car? A bloody good driver!

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A raptor and a Tyrannosaurus Rex walk into a bar. Everyone runs for their lives as the dinosaurs ate everyone who was too slow.

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How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

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How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun...

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whats does a dog cat spider and rat have in common?the dog cat and rat are all mammals.Exept for the rat idiot!!you should have figured THAT out before!!!

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Whats fleash color fleash color and fleashcolor? a naked hobo rolling down a hill

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot, racist.

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Why didn't the boy blow out his birthday cake this year? He died last year.

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69

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What to hear an anti-joke? No.

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Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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How do you create an antijoke? Story written by Danny and Patrick

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What did Little Johny get for Christmas?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Whoop-dee-do.

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Fat people

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How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

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What did the teacher do? He taught.

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A man walks into a bar. It was his push-up bar that he didn't install high enough. He bumps his head and it hurts.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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