I drive in driveways. I recite in recitals. I play in plays. I park on parkways. My greenhouse is green. And my boxing ring is round. Why does everyone think I'm weird??

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What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

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What happen when a plane crash? Everyone on it died...

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lewis=cardiac

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What do silly people in a monastery say? stop munkying around.

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How do you kill a red elephant? You can't red elephants don't exist.

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Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

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So let's pretend two men that had been friends for a very long time, one man asks the other man how he is, so the man tells the other man how he is doing. Then that man asks the other man how he is doing. The two men were engaged in a very interesting conversation. What did the men do next? Nothing. We're pretending, remember?

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How do you stop a bus? throw a boy with an ice cream cone infront of the bus. but...come to think of it, that may not work. he might drop the ice cream on top of it >:l

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What's worse than getting dumped? Being molested by a crazy hobo

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Why did the black man cross the road? To rape the girl on the other side.

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What did the fish say when he hit the wall? A. Dam B. He Charlie I found the wall C. Both Well he didn't say both but he could have said A or B but it wouldn't make sense for him to say both.

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Q: What Did Alakazam Use To Listen Gangnam Style? A: He Used Psybeam.

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What happened to the Jewish man while he was in the shower? He accidentally fell asleep and was late to his job.

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how do you wake up a black man? scream!!!!!

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What's blue and smells? A dead girl guide.

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roses are red and violets are blue so is your mums fanny

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why did nick leave school? bECAUSE HE WAS RETARDED

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What did the dead man say to his best friend? Nothing.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because skeletons don't get invited to parties because they are the remains of something that is dead and that would be a very ood thing to have at a party.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have cancer."

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Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

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whats the difference between a guitar and a fish? A guitar is an instrument used to produce noise and a fish is a living orgnism native to lakes and oceans

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what did the man say when he was reading a book? nothing, if u assume the situation when hes reading to himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops