Q: what did i say when i crashed into the twin tower. A: nothing i was dead

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Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

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There are two kinds of people in this world: those that finish their sentences

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, I am pregnant and that's yo baby !

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Knock knock Whose there? 4

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What's worse then running out of toilet paper? Getting shot

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Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

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A muslim walks onto a plane. He goes to 13C as that is his seat designated on his ticket.

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oh whatever Greece isn't going to leave the eurozone shut up about it already

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whats red and hard to eat a brick.

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What do call a spoon that doesn't work? Broken.

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Did you fall from heaven? Because I seem to notice fractures to your knee, spine and a possible permanent risk of poor posture.

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a kid was running across the street. he just got hit by a truck

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Someone born in the 1970s feeling self-righteous about defending the victims.

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There once was a girl who took away my source of entertainment. Her name was Nicole.

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what did the robot say to the black guy? I'LL BE BACK

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A man invented a time machine that didn't work. Because he wasn't a scientist, he was an ice cream man.

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why did the boy scream? because he got shot.

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What's clear on the outside and grey on the inside? An elephant in a plastic bag.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Who gives a shit

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What did the boy with no legs get? A treadmill.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips can be of multiple colors.

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so a black,Hispanic,chines,white and Asian man walk into a bar and they sat down had a couple drinks and had a good conversation and left as happy as could be

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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