69

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You're on fire.

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What do you call a mix between a beaver and a mammal? You can't mix beavers and mammals, and even if I had said a platypus that would not have been funny.

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Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

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Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted

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A jew goes to a bar,then wakes up with presents under his candels.

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what did the black kid get for Christmas? your bike

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Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

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A Mexican, and Arab and an American are on a plane. The the plane is going down. It hits a mountain and crashes. But there was also a lot of other people on the plane. Families, children, loved ones. It was huge a disaster.

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A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

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Q: What happens when you eat all the potatoes A: They are all gone

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why couldnt the mexican jump the fence? He broke his leg.

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what did the little girl find when she opened the freezer in her basement? food.

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Why do Jews hate hitler? They are jealous of him.

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Penis.

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Where did little Annie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

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How do you kill a black guy? Shoot him in the temple

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What do you call 12 ghosts? A bus accident.

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How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

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what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

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The.

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Why are all black people considered to be relatively fleet of foot as contrasted to other races? Because their gene pool contains a higher frequency for the traits of low body fat and high proportions of musculature.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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