Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have a gun BANG!

Why is Travis so hilarious? ....Trick question hes not.

What do blondes do when they hurt themselves ? They say "Ow", just like anyone else.

Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

What do you call a pencil made entirely of steel? I dont know, i dont name my pencils.

Why couldn't johnny go home? Someone commited arsen and burned it down.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

why did the shark cross the road It didn't its a shark

I like boys!!!!! CC

How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Nothing.

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

A man walks into a bar.

Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

What happens when you throw a red rock in a green pond? It sinks.

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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