What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

What's grey and can't fly? A castle

LUKE, I am your father... this is your mother, your parents dont love you so we've adopted you

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

Roses are red Violets are blue This font is black You smell like shit

Why was the boy with no arms and legs crying? He had a lit match in his anus.

Why is a cat in the desert like Christmas? Because Egypt is a country of deserts, the Egyptians had cats and Jesus, Mary and Joseph escaped to Egypt in the Christmas story before Herod carried out his massacre in Bethlehem on baby boys of under two years old.

What is your bill about? Clinton

Why does Miley Cyrus make sex tapes It's the only acting job she can get

Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

The saying "When Pigs Fly" Can easily be canceled. Just tie a rocket and wings to it and let it go.

Q: What did the little jewish boy get for his birthday in 1940? A: The holocaust.

J- Jiggly E- Enormous S- Sad S- Smelly E- Ethiopian

teacher: who's going to pass english? students: us teacher: not you, i lied about the passing

What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

What did the black guy say to the other black guy? We are both black

Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven beat and raped Six when he was child multiple times, and Seven threatened to kill Six if he told anyone.

mohammed ali walks into a bar, gets a drink, signs a few autographs , and a good time is enjoyed by all.

Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

A bar walks into a man

Sir, your wife is dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...