What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

WANNA HERE A JOKE? (no, i purposely clicked in this joke website to simply here to fulfill my demonic internet pleasures.)

Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

How many kids does it take to fix a light bulb 5 1 to fix the light bulb and the others to get in the van

Q why did the girl scream A she got hit with an axe

What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

Horse.

why do the klu kux klan wear pillowcases on their heads? they were going to go with coon skin but thought it was a little much!!

Q: What's the worst part about having sex with a cougar? A: Dying...

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

stephen hawking walks into a bar...

your momma is so fat that she should be worried about her higher risk of heart disease, diabetes, and ugliness.

A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

How many Obamas does it take to screw an economy? What do you think?

Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

How do you get four gay men on one stool? You get three more stools.

What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

Why can't Sally use the swings? Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there?? ... Not Sally.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...