What happens when you cut a body in half? An erection.

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Roses are red, and violets are freakin violet. Not blue.

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A man walks into a bar a browning automatic rifle, it accidentally fires hitting the main artery in his neck and he promptly bleeds to death.

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why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

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What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

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Whats the difference between anti-jokes and regular jokes? A Fridge full of dead babies being thrown at a black man with no arms or legs swinging from a tree.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him he ain't gonna come.

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What's the color of the sky when an airplane takes off? Blue. What are you, stupid?

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A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

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Q:What do you find in the middle of a pile of dead babies? A:Another dead baby!

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Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

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One,two,skip a few... five,six,seven,eight...(and so on ad infinitum)

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Why did the man die? He was old.

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What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

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Why did the 2 black kids jump the barb-wired fence To get to the other side

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What do you get when you mix Jabba the Hut with a hen? nothing, genetically they are unable to reproduce due to the disproportionate number of chromosomes and DNA

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

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What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

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What do you get when you cross Michael Jackson? A collision, if Michael Jackson were alive.

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Do you like fishsticks? Yes I personally think they are high in saturated fats, but to each his own Oh I thought you were asking if I was homosexual

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What do you call a plane in shining armor? A knight flight.

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Difference between African children and a fat boy? nothing, they're always hungry.

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Why did the black man get arrested? He sold cocaine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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