You know you are really drunk if your blood alcohol Is higher than .08

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Bill went into a store and bought a bagel. However, after eating it, he realizes he meant to buy a doughnut. He tells the cashier that he meant to order a doughnut, and asks for his money back. The cashier says no and the man leaves.

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The cow's name was Friday, But can you guess what day it died? Monday, it had a fun weekend with its family before it was brutally slaughtered.

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roses are black violets are black i am blind

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Your momma is so black that she probably has ancestors indigenous to Africa.

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse becomes depressed. He didn't ask to look like this. He drinks himself into a stupor, and then crashes into another car on the highway on the way home, killing a family of five. The horse is now in jail for life.

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Why was the black man picking cotton from the backyard? Because he enjoys gardening as a hobby, and prefers to do it every Sunday, after work.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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Why is it funny when dogs talk ? Answer: they don't

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How do you piss off a gypsy? Curse at him

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

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Roses are red violets are red bushes are red oh shit my garden is on fire

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Whoever is reading this, I love you and I hope you have a great day.

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A black man walked into a bar. He cashed in big on workers comp.

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"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

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Dimes are silver Pennies are brass Why does your face look like an a**

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Why did suzy get in the car? She wanted to go somewhere.

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karn chevalier

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The man was so gay he grew breasts and got breast cancer.

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Q: what did the grandmother give to her grandson. A: a lightbulb

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When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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