a horse walks into a bar, hours later it walks out on two legs and the man who saw it all happen couldn't believe his eyes. The man then turns to the bartender and says, "I theenk eye've had enuf, Cut me hoff!"

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Q: Why was the balloon scared of unicorns? A: Buses dont exist therefore the balloon was just insane.

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A baby seal walks into a club. The man holding the club skins him and makes a lot of money.

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What do you get when someone tells you an anti joke? An anti joke.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Rape

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What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A bike.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Q: why cant elvis draw a picture. A: cause hes dead.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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A fish swims up your penis...

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"Roll back into the kitchen and imagine me a sandwich!" yelled the abusive husband to his paraplegic wife.

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Q:Whats a similarity between your mom and your dad? A:They both hate you -Ryan V

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Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive hair traits.

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What liquid is white and sticky and annoying to get on your hand? Glue.

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What's Gay and has a penis? Justin Bieber, I lied about the penis

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Why don't meth addicts like food? Because they have not teeth to chew it with.

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You see the love of your life. You can't say anything. She walks toward you. You can't move. She sits on you. You can't do anything. She starts crapping on you. You realize your a toilet. -Adam Chebali

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Whats the difference between a baby in a comma and an iPod? I actually use the baby.

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Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

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What do Ping-Pong and Godzilla have in common? Both of them have nothing to do with budhism.

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An Asian, a redneck, an Irish, and an Iranian walk into a bar. All but the Iranian were asked to go back to the parking lot and park their car to take up only one space.

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2 black kids walk into school

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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