Whats worse than a suicide bomber? Hubcaps

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roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

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Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

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Why is the redneck crying? They died of diabeetus.

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So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

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Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

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Your mother is so stupid that she has lived a very unfulfilling life due to her lack of education.

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What did little Timmy do in the Library? Read

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Whats worse than passing out drunk and having your friends draw on your face? When you die of alcohol poisoning in the morning

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Why didn't the guy have kids? He didn't want them

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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Q: What is scarier than the boogie man? A: Herpes

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he's working out.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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European on my shoes, buddy.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Daddy drinks, Because you cry.

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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Three cows are sitting in a field The first cow says, "MOOOO!" The second cow says, "MOOOO!" The third cow says, "MOOOO!"

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A father and his son get into an accident and are whisked away to the hospital. The father dies, and the son is brought into surgery. The doctor is rushed in, but looks at the boy and says "I can operate on this boy, his my son." How is this possible? The boy's father was a zombie.

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A man walks into a bar The bartender asks: What would you like to drink?

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Why did the cow cross the road? Because he escaped the farm and didn't know what else to do.

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Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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