Why did billy have a frog stapled to his face? Because he was having a bad day.

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A blonde fails an exam because she did not study

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A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse didn't respond, because it's a horse.

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Why was the Tyrannosaurus Rex such an aggressive animal? it had short arms so it could not masturbate.

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What starts with S and end in H-I-T? shit.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, I have amnesia.

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You're mama's SO stupid that when she applied to college, they were happy to help.

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A plumber walks into a bar and the bartender says "What will it be?" and the plumber says "no drinks thank you, I'm here to fix the toilet."

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Why did Jessy crawl to her bed? Because she has no legs.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Fairy floss" "Fairy floss who?" "I'm sugar coating your Cancer diagnoses"

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Q: What's black and blue and is all over Timmy's mother? A: The bruises his father gave her when he came home drunk.

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Women are only good for seventy-one things: Love A proper home to come home to everyday 69

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A man invented a time machine that didn't work. Because he wasn't a scientist, he was an ice cream man.

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If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

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pretty soon we'll all be dead

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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Roses are red Violets are FUCKING VIOLET NOT FUCKING BLUE

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knock knock who's there your moms dead im sorry

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Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

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why did the young teenage boy E J A C U L A T E? because he saw his sexy dad shirtless.

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So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

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Q:Whats a similarity between your mom and your dad? A:They both hate you -Ryan V

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Your mom is so fat she weighs significantly higher then most females of her age and height.

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How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? None. Babies shouldn't be changing light bulbs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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