Mel Gibson is awoken by the ringing of his telephone. He proceeds to have a nice conversation with his wife.

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What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews celebrate Hanukkah.

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I just threw up..In my pants.

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(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

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What is the difference between an empty bucket and a bucket of water? The Water.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know I'm not a mind reader.

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Statistics show That people with the most birthdays Live the longest

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What do you do with a dog that has no legs? Take him to the vet and have him put to sleep, it's the only humane thing to do.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a woman starring at him, she seems attractive... he walks up to her and realizes that sheis quite mediocre if not even ugly. He proceeds to say "You'll do"

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I was lying in bed looking at the stars in the sky What did i think to myself? Were the heck is the ceiling???

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Knock knock. Who's there? Chet. Chet who? I probably shouldn't be giving you my name, just get in the fucking van...

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Q: When do you know you've had to much to drink? A: When the zebra in your belly button starts talking to you

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Why are you asking me this question? That's awful and you should be ashamed of yourself.

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Why did the pony say neigh? That`s all he can say

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god sent down his only son, " his only son." so in gods eyes we are a bunch of girls.

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When life gives you lemons.............. take them free stuff is awesome.

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Who ever invented the "Knock- Knock jokes" should get a "No-bell prize"

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Why did the black man go to the store with a gun? He recently bought it a couple days before to go hunting, but it wasn't working correctly.

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Doctor! Doctor! There is a fly in my soup! Moral: Huh?

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What's funnier then 24... The Holocost

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What do you call a cat with no ears? Anything you fucking well like. Cats can't understand speech.

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A ginger kid, a blonde kid and a brunette jump off a 50 foot building... All of them die apart from all of them because luckily there was a swimming pool at the bottom

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Why did the beautiful girl get the job over the not so beautiful looking girl She was more qualified

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops