What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't come anyways.

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Q: How do you keep an idiot in suspense? A:

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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ding dong thats right no knock on door anymore

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There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

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If you can't see what I see... You must be blind. If you can see what I see... Well I can't be blind because I have been able to see all my life!

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Why did the boy loose his glass with milk? He got hit by a bus.

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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Why wasn't the unplugged computer on?

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The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

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The Tiarajudens is a Permian land-walrus.

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What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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Why was Timmy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face

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Jesse is so fat that Roy is jealous of his big ass tits

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A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

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Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

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How do you get a black guy to learn how to read? Find a stolen book and tell them that it's the recipe for the spices in fried chicken.

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ... it wanted to cross the road.

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I guess calling you dear was a bit overboard for you huh? Well, just promise me you will get whatever help you need if you get ill.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Still the Holocaust

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Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops