Why did the plane crash? Because, it's pilot was a bagel.

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Why did the man die? He was old.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Justin Bieber

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Why didn't Anne Frank ever leave the attic? She did.

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Listen bitch, get over here, let me poke out your fucking eyeball, and then you tell me if it is reasonable or not to fucking be pissed afterwards! As for your goddamn technique, of course I understand it, I use it too, its the ironman method as far as I am concerned. Do not share it with people here, you can go share it with your little "shadow people" but that shit took years to develop. But yeah, you tell me whatever the hell you consider "reasonable" you get me the money, and then we can see about being "reasonable". I know many of your methods, NLP, hypnosis, covert, warm and cold reading, I know you are no fucking psychic nor do you read minds, stop telling me what the hell your "Order" is, because whatever the hell it is, your "Nero`s" have proven on this site alone, that its a laughingstock that in no way could have brought six hundred people towards liking you, even less six millions.

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Man walks into Malaysian Airlines "Hey, can I have the next flight to--" "This is our only policy! You pay the fare we pick the where."

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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What happened to the homosexual jiggalo? He ended up getting aids from having anal sex with various men which is not the best idea because the anus where poop comes from.

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Why was the pig squealing? Because all four of its legs were tied together and it was about to have it's head chopped off so the meat could be processed for people to enjoy.

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A man was walking down the street in the pitch black dark and he looked into a pitch black dark window. What did he see? Pitch black dark people.

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Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

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relatable: school : 2+2=4 Homework: 2+4+2=8 Exam: oscer has 4 apple his train was 7 min early now caulate the mass of the sun

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Who's worse: Ghandi or Hitler Answer: Hitler

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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What killed Hitler? His gas bill.

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why did the mexican choose to work as a landscaper instead of at taco bell? landscaping pays much better and was a more practical decision in this economy to support his family of 13.

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your mama so jewish ( fat ) she had to take up two seats on the plane to fly here in the end there was no chocolate left she was taking up the whole plane space.

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar... They then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, harmony and understanding between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, they truly can coexist, and decide to pursue peace among one another and the rest of society.

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grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrHirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr can u find the r

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Q: When birds fly in a "V", why is one side always longer? A: There is one extra bird on that side

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%3c%2fa%3e%3c%2fh3%3e alert("The Game."); %3cScR%69pt%2ffoo%3eev%61l%28%27ale%27+%27ert%28%29%27%29;

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Nineteen terrorists walk into three airports. Several hours later, thousands of people are dead sending the world into a state of emergency that subsequently changed how we live our current lives under the constant threat of both government oppression and extremist terrorism.

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What did the priest do to the young catholic boy? Bless him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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