what happens when steven hawking walks into a bar? everyone cheers at the miracle of science.

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hi dave

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A black guy walks into a bar. He drinks some wine and exits the bar. -Lets Go Mets, not Yankees

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Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

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why was 14 scared of 15? 7-8-9

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If you dumb fooks keep swearing we are going to get banned.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Whoop-dee-do.

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why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

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Black people don't exist. Their skin is rather of a brown tone.

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What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

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What did the chair say to the guy? Nothing, as it is a chair and chairs can't talk

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What did Billy say to Timmy? Timmy! I'm so sorry. *Sniffles* I didn't mean to throw the fork that hard. Rest in peace Timmy...

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Its Eliza, hope you are still there, would you mind getting here sooner? This site is not safe, besides its cold here, I mean send somebody else if you got to, I might look frail but Nero taught me a thing or two, so I can honestly say that Nero taught me better than you guys just in case. Funny you say there is no code, yet add three, yeah you better expect nothing "fancy", Mr.Torture dungeon master. Honestly though I do not blame you, and if I really meant you where a psycho, I would not have agreed/asked you showed up, I am serious I need to get out of here.

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A jew goes into a church. Yolo.

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how old is god? i don't know thats why i'm asking you. by: Brennan pickrell

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WHO LET THE GHOST OUT! BOO BOO BOO BOO BOO! Mortals: That was a bit funny...

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What did the monkey say to the lion? I'm being sexually abused by my handler, and feel so violated.

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I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

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A:Wanna hear a joke? B: Sure A: A joke

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Knock Knock Who's there? no one, you've got Psycosis

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Why couldn't the pirate enter into the movie? Because he's dead.

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USA, one of the richest and most proud nations on this plan- VIETNAM 9/11 BYE FOR NOW!!!

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Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

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why doesnt jesus play hockey? he got nailed to the boards

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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