Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

Why did the little girl lose her necklace? Because she got her head blown off

If Johnny can hold 7 bottles of Vodka in one hand and 6 cans of beer in the other, what does Johnny have? A drinking problem.

what do the parents of a starved family do? kill their kids chop them up into little pieces and eat them.

A can walks into a bar...HAHAHAHA JK LOL thats not possible! What was I thinking? Silly me! -David Bruggen

Why did the camel climb Mount Everest? Actually, he wasn't a camel, he was a very experienced mountain climber. In any case no one really knows why he did it.

What happened after Jimmy fell off the cliff? He died.

what did steven hawking say to the prostitute? Nothing, he is unable to speak, he needs help from his word speaker thing.

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But it wasn't actually getting bigger, it was just getting closer. So I got hit in the face.

How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

An Irishman walks into a bar he asks for directions, and leaves.

Whats the difference between the Taliban and a Football Team? I'm not on the football team.

Whats worse than spilling ketchup on your shirt? Getting hit by a bus

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

A Jew finally tipped He was in a canoe

Ian Watkins was excited to attend the opening of the children's ward at the hospital today. It went well and the day was a success.

How do u know what a ass is. You no once you meet adam mac.

What do you call an Aboriginal in a yellow sleeping bag? An organised man, ready for the harsh winter ahead.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Why do i love this website? Because it is funny.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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