When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

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A bear woke up from his annual hibernation to find that his stomach is growling. "I sure am hungry." the sleepy bear said. So he found some berries, but spit them out. "These berries are far too bitter." the playful bear said. He then found some honey, however was soon bombarded with a swarm of bees. "That honey is good, but not that good." the jolly bear said. He then stumbled upon a cabin. "I wonder if there is any food in here..." the curteous bear wondered. The events that followed are now reffered to by the locals as the May 20th Massacre. While no witnesses survived, the police reports depict that the Martinez family, a young family of 7 enjoying their memorial day weekend in their New Hampshire cabin, was brutally slain by a blood-thirsty animal who tracked each of them throughout the house in a period of approximately 45 minutes.

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Your moma is so nasty. And one day she had a geust over and the geust says " May I use the restroom?" Yes but make sure you use the coffe can to the right because the letf one is full.

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What's the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair

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Yes or No? You're wrong because it was both.

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why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? He doesn't have arms or legs. Why didn't Johnny have arms or legs? Johnny is a potato

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How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

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What's Green and flies? Super Grapes cousin Super Grape

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What is red and hangs around the back of a train? A miscarriage.

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Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

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When does the ice cream get thrown at the yellow horse on thursday evening? Purple Monkey Rainbow

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a black man has a shotgun. having an IQ of 11 he shot his hands off

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why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

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A- Knock knock. B- Who's there? A- The interrupting doctor. B- The interrupt- A- You have cancer.

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What's cooler than being cool? An object at absolute zero

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was curious about something that had diverted his attention.

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How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

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What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

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What happened to my sunglasses?

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No antijoke here.

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Knock Knock Come in Come in who? Come in...wait what?

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why couldnt the guy move his legs cuz he was paralyzed

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Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops