whats green and slimy? green slim

How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

Everybody will die

What did Rebecka black say on Thursday? Today is thursday.

What happened when the engineering student studied for a physics final? They failed.

What do you call a middle ages man driving a van filled with children? Coach.

Q:When do you club a newborn baby? A:Whenever you want to because babies are stupid

You're so fake, Barbara Millicent Roberts is jealous of you.

Three Lawyers are walking, one falls down, gets up and continues walking

What do you get when you put two landsharks together? Three landsharks.

Why did the blind man itch his knee? He has cancer

who lives a pineapple under the sea? a proper spazztwat.

A woman woke up next to her husband that was already awake. She said "F*** you" and walked out of the house. On the other side of the world, a horse is giving birth to a chihuahua.

Whats black and white and red all over?.. The L.A. Race Riots.

An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

Why did the black man buy a gun? because he wanted to go hunting.

A hindu and a muslim walk into a bar. They start arguing over their different fundamental religious beliefs and then considering it is an american bar, an american christian extremist quickly shoots them both for being " from that part of the world"

What did the bacon say to Sam's eggs? Why are you green?

How many victims of the holocaust does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. They're all dead you sick fuck.

What do you call a black man eating dessert? A man of African ancestry enjoying a sweet treat.

What is Arnold Schwarzenegger's favorite lollipop? Choppa Chups.

what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

i hate when mothers said " clean your room" me " why " mom " because we have guest coming " me " oh i am sorry i didn't know we are all gathering in my f**king room

Q. How many blonds do you know? A. I don't know any blonds, but are you perhaps talking about blondes? Because if so, I still don't know any.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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