What did Harry Potters owl say to Harry Potter? delivowe for hawwy potter!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

YEAH THEY DO!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A Women is holding a piece of paper with her rights what is she holding a grocery list

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what is worse than a guy pissed?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How did the black guy, get a nice car, house, and attire? He went to college, and got a job.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

thumb_up thumb_down -8

So, my friend David hasn't always been the sharpest tool in the shed. After all, he is a spoon.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe, When he woke up one night he discovered with fright, That the friendly old neighbor from next door had broken into his house with a chain saw in an alcohol-induced murder attempt.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the difference between the son of a prostitute and Luke Skywalker? Luke knew who his father was.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the cow say to the farmer who was driving by in a tractor? MOOOOOOOO!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you get five black men in a car? You offer them a good deal, then show them the car fax.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

3 black guys walk into a restaurant and they sat down, ate their meals, and even tipped the waitor handsomely then for about 10 minutes they talk and then leave restaurant. Soon after a white guy comes and holds up the place for all it's money then killing three hostages before being taken down by the police.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape his burning car wreck.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what do you call a man with blue eyes??? a man with blue eyes

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the blind man say when you asked hi his favorite color? Nothing he is death too

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is the worst part about dying? no-one cause no-one has ever survived dying to know what it is like so how is it possible that I would know

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

thumb_up thumb_down -8

CISSY: TIMMY! COME AND DO YOUR HOMEWORK THIS INSTANT TIM: ....................../´¯/) ....................,/¯../ .................../..../ ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') .........\.................'...../ ..........''...\.......... _.·´ ............\..............( ..............\.............\... *CISSY SMACKS TIMMY AND SENDS HIM TO HIS ROOM WITHOUT DINNER.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the woman spend all her time in the kitchen? For fear of her abusive husband.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why didnt Tim Tebow go to church? He had practice half an hour before the service was scheduled to start, and to do both was impossible and missing practice would have resulted in disciplinary action from both his coaches and his teammates.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the boy without arms get in his Christmas present? A pair of gloves. Just kidding, he didn't open it yet.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A kid walks in to a bar. The bartender asks the boy where his parents are and he replies that he does not know. They call the police who proceed to try to contact the boy's parents. They have gone missing so the boy must go up for adoption. He gets adopted by an abusive family and runs away. Without a family, job, or money, he could not afford a house. He lived alone in a box until he died of starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops