What do you get when you cross a black man and a Mexican man? I don't know.

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Why did the dish run away from the spoon? None of them ran neither one has legs

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What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well, you should, if only for the cultural experience.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interupting doc- You have aids.

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Your momma is so fat, her doctor recommended exercising more and eating healthier.

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How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

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A vodka please Sir this is McDonald's Ok sorry, a McVodka please

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How do you get a Mexicans attention? By calling him by his name.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

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Q. What's smarter then the smartest woman in the world? A. A retarded seal, or pretty much anything else.

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Roses are red, Facebook is blue, we have mutual friends, and violets are blue and roses are red. FRIDGE

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What did the coal miner get for Christmas? Black Lung Disease

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I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

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Why couldn't the grandma remember what she did last night? Because she has Alzeihmers and grandmas don't do anything.

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How do you make a small child cry? You cut off his fingers..

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Mahmy

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Wanna hear a joke? Your contact list.

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What is a baby chick after 9 days old? 10 days old.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'Why the long face?' The horse replies 'I've got AIDS.'

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Mets.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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