A mormon walks into a bar.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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how do you scare a blonde person? dress up in orange and scream "mustard"

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Because it's a tornado, that's what tornadoes do.

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How did Steve Jobs die? Of cancer, in a bed, and surrounded by his loved ones.

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Q: Where does Cher sit? A: I have no idea.

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Whats worse than passing out drunk and having your friends draw on your face? When you die of alcohol poisoning in the morning

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Why did the friendly not play outside? Because they were dead. Just like your dreams.

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Where did the did the Islamic person fly the jet to? Ben Gurion International Airport located in Israel

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when u cant say fuck say firetruck because it starts with f and it ends with uck ?firetruck?

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What did the politician say to the bank robber? "Were both robbers"

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So a baby seal walks into a club

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Why did the Hispanic man have drugs in his pocket? He had just gone to the pharmacy.

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies on fire and a pile of living babies on fire? The dead babies are usually not as loud.

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why did the black guy talk to the monkey? they were in the same cage.

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A black man walks into a store. As he leaves, the detector goes off. It turns out the sales clerk had forgotten to take out one of the tags on his purchase. The sales clerk promptly took it off, and the man left to enjoy the rest of his day.

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Why did the man go to the hospital Because he was hurt

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BOTTOM!!!

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Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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What did one elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. Elephants don't talk.

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What do you call a black man and an Asian working in a field? You politely ask their names and then use them; their colour is of no consequence.

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Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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