an average-looking woman walks into a bar. nobody really notices.

A blonde has a headache, so she goes to the doctor. The doctor prescribes some Advil, she takes it, and then feels significantly better.

Vote this up or I'll tell my mum!

Democracy.

How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

Why did the young boy die from Aggressive cancer? ...Because there isn't a cure.

If I met your mom before you was born, you would still be born.

in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

what did the doctor say to another doctor? we are doctors

Here is a nursery rhyme: Jane is a scruff, she has a head full of nits. She also had pain in her great big... Now don't get excited. Don't be mislead. Because all that Jane had was a pain in her head!

Why did the guy in the wheelchair die? He was mauled by tigers.

So a black man steals a bike Because it was unlocked, and that was just poor planning.

The world blows up and everyone except for one man and his house make it out alive "Knock knock" "Whos there?" "Me" "Me who?" "Ummmm, its me, duh" It turns out the man was very bored and decided to go knock on his own door and tell knock knock jokes

Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

What's an anti joke? Then I ate my digestive biscuit.

Why did the man cross the street? He just wanted to .. i don't see why not, i mean he could have gotten ran over by a train on a road but who knows he could have been run over by a turtle!

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

What if I told you.....potatoe

two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

What happened when the lawyer went surfing? A shark came up and tore his leg off.

what would you get if you combined a sixth grader with a machine gun? A homophobe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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