Jon waits in his driveway for a bit then rides off to a lemonade stand but doesn't stop because the stand is surrounded by police who have arrested the kids at the stand for selling spiked lemonade. He continues past the stand and goes somewhere else (probably Subway).

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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I popped my head over my sexy neighbour's fence today to see her lying in her bikini. "Wow, you're gorgeous!" I burst out, "I hope you know how to do CPR." "Why?" she asked with a giggle, "Because I've taken your breath away?" "No," I replied. "I've just run your son over out front."

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A man walks into a bar a browning automatic rifle, it accidentally fires hitting the main artery in his neck and he promptly bleeds to death.

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Why does 1+1=2? Dunno, e-mail me if you do.

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What long black and tasty? Licorice

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Have you heard the one about the dead guy? Neither has he.

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Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Not all black people are tall, and if they are it is probably from their specific genes.

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roses are red violents are blue your dad is gay soon it all be you !

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Ehh

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what is the difference betweeb 69 and 77? 8

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Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

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Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

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Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

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What's hard, long and screws a blond? An IQ test.

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knock , knock That Was The Same Mistake That Ann Frank Made.

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A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

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Why did the African cross the road? Because he was searching for his family after his village was massacred by rebel soldiers.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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VITAMIN C!

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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What happened to the boy who ate a piece of his Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

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What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

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What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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