What did the fish say to the human ? He didn't say anything fish can't speak.

What's your blood type? Red.

What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

Why did the Harry Potter fan cry in school? She ran out of tampons.

Two lifelong friends walk into the locl Bar and each order a Beer. " So how's life treating ya?" Phil replies, " Well Doug, I've got Stage Four Lung Cancer. I'm going to Die, remember?" Unfortunately, Doug doesn't remember because Doug has a Brain Tumor.

Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

How do you know when your sister's on her period? Your dad's dick tastes like blood

Knock Knock Who's there? a tree

WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

whay did the monkey fall out of the tree? he was dead. why did the cat fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

Why couldn't Jesus get a driver's license? Because automobiles did not exist 2000 years ago.

You know what's stupid and gay? Idiots and homosexuals, respectively.

Why do jews have large noses? Genetics.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his wife in the hospital. She has terminal cancer.

Why did Polly fall off her roof? Because her dad pushed her.

Why did the gay kid drop his ice cream Because he got punched in the face.

Knock Knock. Whose there? Fed-Ex, here's your new brother.

Why was the gay man gay? Because he likes touching other guys penises

what do you call someone with one arm? Handicapped.

Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

How did Chris die? Bush-fire

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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