What happened to the old man at his suprise party? He died from the shock.

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Hey

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Why did Sally fall of the swing set? Because she got hit with a mattress

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David entered a radio contest to see who had the best pun; his pun was insufficient and he did not win.

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Why did the man go to the doctors? He was concerned about his health.

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What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

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What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

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What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

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What do you call a black man that has just gotten out of jail? A former criminal who has served his time in prison and is now trying to redeem himself by becoming a respectable member of his community

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Ginger woodpecker throbbing in the moonlight

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How do you get Vladamir Putin to smile? You tickle him.

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He who laughs last...is not a laughing owl because they're extinct.

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Q:Why did the black man fall down? A: he got hit in the face by a refrigerator

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Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

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Christ is a conspiracy

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what happend to Helen Keller when she fell in a hole She climed out of the hole

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What's ripe and orange? A ripe orange.

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What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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Why did the bunny give you a funny look? It has epilepsy.

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Linda: See that rainbow? Isn't it beautiful? Bart: I'm color blind.... Linda: Well...this is awkward...

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Where did Adolf go as a vacation after the war? Hell

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What did the dead man say? Nothing because dead human beings have no beating heart and do not live so they cannot speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops