Why is the ground wet It rained

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one underneath it. What's worse than that? It has to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It goes back for seconds.

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Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

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Why did the nun cry? 12 babies were killed under her care.

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What did I wake upto this morning that was white , cold and 2 inches deep? My tiny flaccid penis.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. The worst ones remind you of how horrible your life is.

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'knock knock' 'Who's there?" "the mailman, Ive got mail for you"

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What was Tiger (from Whinnie the Pooh) looking for in the toilet? Pooh

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if you didn't know that, go back to school.

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Knock, Knock Wh- SWAT TEAM GET ON THE F****** GROUND!!!!!!!

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How do you kill a Chinese hobo Shoot him

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Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

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Why is the young Chinese boy crying? Because he is being raped.

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A boy owned a dog that was uncommonly shaggy. Many people remarked upon its considerable shagginess. When the boy learned that there are contests for shaggy dogs, he entered his dog. The dog won first prize for shagginess in both the local and the regional competitions. The boy entered the dog in ever-larger contests, until finally he entered it in the world championship for shaggy dogs. But the day before the championship the dog died.

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roses are red violets are blue the thing in the toilet reminds me of you :)

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I like playing in the balls. I like balls.

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A black guy pulls into a KFC drive thru and orders some chicken. The cashier tells him that they are out of chicken, so the black goes to McDonald's instead.

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy masterbating.

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What do you call a newborn son? The proudest moment of your life. What do you call a newborn daughter? A disappointment.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Love Chocolate, More Than I Love You

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An american, a french and a japanese walk into a bar. They are colleagues from the International University of Florida, used to go out together.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because colonel sanders was chasing it with an axe

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Matthew Baker

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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