When life gives you cancer, make cancerade.

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What do you call a black man and an Asian working in a field? You politely ask their names and then use them; their colour is of no consequence.

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Q: What do you call cheese that's not your own? A: Someone else's cheese

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Why did the Mexican jump the border? Because his mom told him the grass was always greener on the other side... She lied.

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What is white and flies upwards? A retarded Snowflake.

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Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because 7, 8, 9

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Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

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what Did The Cow Say To The Chicken, Moo

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Whats better at driving? A pig or a chicken. Neither because they are animals and it is impossible for the to even posses the power of controlling a moving vehicle.

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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What is in your backyard and is stalking you? Corn

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Q: What do you call a nun in a wheelchair A: Handicapped.

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What did the kid with cancer get for christmas. Nothing. He was Jewish.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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How do you drown a blonde? A: Drowing any person no matter the color of their hair is conpletely illegal and considered murder.

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roses are red violets are blue my name is kate boyd im gay

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A boy walks up to a girl he finds attractive and says "You're body's kick'in! ... i mean...hey, do you know karate?"

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What did one deer say to the other? Nothing. The second deer was killed while they were eating and now the first deer is scarred dot life.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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Whats worse than suicide? death

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Q. How do you drowned a blond A. Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops