a blond was walking across a river thinking how do I get across. when she saw another blond. and asked how do I get to the other side and the other said your already on the other side.

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Girl: I wanna get yo pants. Boy: but im wearing shorts.

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Obama

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a man walks off of a damn. a damn is not a noun, thus nobody can walk off it

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why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

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What's the difference between Neal Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neal Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON, while Michael Jackson enjoyed touching young boys.

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

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What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

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What do you call a bunch of white men sitting on a bench? The NBA.

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there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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What did the Crippled Orphan get for Christmas Cancer

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Did nims chinnie? Fins.

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I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his mother and father had just disowned him.

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Why was the black man running? Because he was playing capture the flag.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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A blonde and a brunette walk into a job interview. The brunette gets the job because she is more qualified and has more experience.

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Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

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Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

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What's green and would kill you if it fell on you? A golf course

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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