this new cologne, it's kind of gross smelling.

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats the difference in car and a bicycle? One has an engine and drivetrain designed to run on gas and the other is powered by your output of work

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why the fuck he crossed the road, I don't know what he is thinking.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the the man, the dog, and the psychiatrist talk about? The man's childhood experience losing his pet as a contributer to his symptoms of psychosis.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a black guy driving an airplane? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down

How Do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door take the elephant out put the giraffe in and close the door. The lion king has a meeting with all the animals but one doesn't turn up, which one is it? The giraffe because it's still in the fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the man drown in the bath? He was a quadriplegic and couldn't support himself above the water.

thumb_up thumb_down

A cheeseburger and fries walk into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we don't serve lunch"

thumb_up thumb_down

Your mother is so fat that when she went to get weighed she was diagnosed as clinically obese and later broke down into tears.

thumb_up thumb_down

Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because it was raining.

thumb_up thumb_down

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock Knock Who's there? Sally Sally who? Haha I'm just kidding, I'm Jorge.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the rat say to the dog? Nothing, he is a rat and therefore incapable of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

thumb_up thumb_down

What did Kane Larkin get on his birthday? Cancer...

thumb_up thumb_down

I cant find my anti-jokes this is also one

thumb_up thumb_down

WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

thumb_up thumb_down

Jackie Chan: Who the **** is chuck Testa? A: Chuck Testa was an internet sensation who became famous after his video on Youtube advertising his taxidermy business, Ojai Valley Taxidermy.

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

thumb_up thumb_down

A young woman goes to a wild, infamous nightclub, all alone. She arrives safely at home a few hours later.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops