Roses are red Violets are blue What about pansies

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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I asked god for a bike but i know he doesn't work like that so i stole a bike and asked him for forgiveness

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What's your star sign? Cancer. Oh you're gonna die. AWKWARD.

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knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

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What's worse than having you're leg fall asleep? Getting Polio

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

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What did michael jackson say to the boys he touched? Nothing. Hes dead

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Why don't elephants smoke? Because they would be afraid of the fire, and they are much more adversely affected by recreational drugs than humans are.

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What would you call the Flinstones if they were black? Niggas

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why did the black guy kill the white guy. the white guy killed his family.

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Yo mama's so fat that she needs substantially larger clothes than most other people

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let the chickens out?!

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

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You wanna know what's out of this world? The moon

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

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What's worse than finding a holocaust in your apple? A worm.

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A man walks to a bar and sees a very hot blonde sitting across the room. Turns out it was actually a blonde man and they both had a wonderful night because they were both homosexual.

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Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To blow up a train

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what starts with F and ends with ead? Fred was walking to school one day when he heard a strange noise in a tree. He walked up to the tree, looked up, and saw a cat. Fred was late for class, so he decided to go to school and help the cat out after school. Eight hours later, Fred came up to the tree and looked up to see if the cat was there. It wasn't. The cat was lying next to the tree, dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops