A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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a blonde takes 1 hour to swim 100m of breaststroke.

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Why did Jennifer shit herself? Because there was a black man staring through her window!

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twenty three roaches walk into a bar. the bar is evacuated due to insects.

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what did Marvin Gay's father say to him before he died? "hey come listen to this 45 real quick"

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THERE'S THE IDENTITY THIEF GET HIM!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because animals walking across a paved street is a very common occurrence ever since the industrialization of the modern world.

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Q How do you know when a gay walks into a bar A Albert rushes over and starts feeling him up

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I love you

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yo momma so ugly that yo your birth certifiicate is an apology from thew condem factory

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Why did the woman drown in the bathtub? Her husband was holding her under.

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What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Cuz she had no arms! B I T C H

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Yo mama is so stupid... She didn't graduate high school.

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A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

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A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

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How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

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Japanese study of the stereotypical Italian under scientifical environment: Japanese: Test one: Hello! Italian: AHAHA HOHOO! WHOPPIE! ME IS MARIO MARIO I AM MAGIC MUSHROOM EATING PLUMBER! I AMMA GONNA JUMP ON YOU (AND gRAPE YOU!) Japanese: ACTIVATE FLAMETHROWERS GET! Italian: AHAHAHAHAHOOOOOOOOOOO! Japanese: OMG ITALIAN IS STRONG! ACTIVATE TRAP DOOR! ITALIAN: *falls down door* MAMA MIA! OH NOH! Japanese: Puh! BEWARE OF ITALIAN STEREOTYPE! Experiment two:Japanese experiment with in actual Italia: Japanese: Hello Mr Itali... Italian: Are you looking at me? Japanese: Uh well I... Italian: ARE YOU LOOKING AT MEEE? WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO LOOK ME IN THE EYES EH? Japanese: Balls? Uh my mother when she gave birth to... Italian: I SAID WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO TALK TO ME! ITALIANS ARE DANGEROUS!

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q. What's the worst thing about your family a. There related to you

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

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Q: How do you turn a purple panda into a red panda A: Feed it grey poop and because it tasted so bad it got so mad it turned red.

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What happened when the black man and the white woman mated? Nothing. The man was infertile.

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Bob: This joke is so hilarious but you must start off by saying knock knock. Tom: okay... Knock knock Bob: who's there? Tom: ...... Bob: well? Tom: I don't know what to say??? Bob: so the joke left ya speechless!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops