Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

What's did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

A woman walked out of the kitchen.

What happened to the fish? It drowned

Why did the man stop smoking? Because he was shot in the face.

Why did the Hindu eat the Mongolian? He tried, the Mongolian raped him.

Why did the cookie go to the doctors? It didn't because cookies are Inanimate and are incapable of mobility

I never drink liquor alone... except for when I'm alone.

What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

what did the man say to his cat? sex. -teagan doherty

Albert your flies undone.

Knock knock. Who's there? The police The police who? Sir, your wife is dead.

roses are red violets are blue holy sh*t slendermans behind you

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She didn't own a car.

Knock knock. Who's there? Jack. Honey, Jacks here, will you get the door?

Half empty = half full Therefore Half (empty) = half (full) empty= full Half empty

A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

"CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!!" -Spongebob

Whats funny about a guinea pig water skiing? The part where he explodes.

Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

Why did the black boy fail out of high school? Because his grades were bad.

A man walks into a clothing store, he calls his wife, buys a shirt, and leaves.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get the bag.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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