An astronaut, a nun and a fireman walk into a bar. They all order something to drink as they have all had a busy day.

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A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears, realizing that his life as he knew it is over, and recognizing the horrible burden he is about to become on his family, both financially and emotionally.

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why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

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How many kids does it take to fix a light bulb 5 1 to fix the light bulb and the others to get in the van

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WANNA HERE A JOKE? (no, i purposely clicked in this joke website to simply here to fulfill my demonic internet pleasures.)

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Jew logic fail: Jew: We have endured suffering for thousands of years! Guy: And how old are you again? Jew: eight. Moral: If you see a goddamn moral in this one then post it yourself :P

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

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Whats bloody and is dead. My son.

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ms caissie is secretly laughing at these...

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what is the difference betweeb 69 and 77? 8

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Yo mama so fat when she goes to the gym, she makes her trainer skinnier.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Joe Bereta is a member of al Qaeda.

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— Knock knock. — Who's there? — Funny. — Funny who? — A funny joke.

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How do Mexicans like their eggs? It's a matter of personal opinion, of course.

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what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? It depends on their painting skills.

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What poops,smells bad,burps,wears diapers,farts,and screams spank me with a bib on That Depends what you do on saturday nights

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What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

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What did the old man say? Im old

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whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

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What do you call a black woman working at a bar? A Bartender. What do you call an asian woman working at a bar? A Bartender.

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Q.-What's the difference between broccoli and a dead moose? A.-Yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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