What do you call a deer with no eyes? A blind deer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it doesn't have the capacity for rational thought and decision-making and was subsequently hit by a car.

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whats long, black, and smells like shit? a big turd

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for his birthday? A bike

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What did the angry man with tourette syndrome say when he smashed his thumb with a hammer? Ouch.

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why does the world spin? Chuck Norris says so

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Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

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How many times has Belle Ahern been hit in the mutt 76. Stupid slut

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Did you hear about the circus fire? Yes, apparently there were no casualties but all their props and equipment were destroyed, which will set the company back financially, even with the insurance.

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Q: Why did Suzie fall out the swings? A: She had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.....

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People thought hitler said "I want to burn the jews" he really said "I want a glass of juice".

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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Me

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What did the guy say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Q: Why do geese fly in a V? A: It's more aerodynamic.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy launched a flare. Nobody came.

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So a guy walks into a bar. Ouch. It was a gay bar.

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Whats better than sex? Not dying. Ha

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Jim: You wanna hear a funny joke? Tim: Sure Jim: Well, if you want a funny joke, this isn't the place to be.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim your cousin. Kathy then let Jim inside her house and helped him carry the pizza boxes into the kitchen. Everyone had fun and enjoyed the party very much that night.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This joke is stupid, Chuck Testa.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops