Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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This one time, at band camp, I played the trumpet.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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How did the woman get pregnant? She was thrown into a pool filled with semen.

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roses are red violets are blue your moms a whore thats it

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A man quites his job to open a coffee shop which has been a dream of his for years, The shop does well with a healthy supply of customers and a steady income,The man is now financially stable.

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Once upon a time a was born

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what happens when you throw a green rock into the red sea? -- it gets wet

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Neither have I, nobody knew him.

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whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

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whats black with purple?nothing no animals or humans have anything like that

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Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

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Q. Why was the Asian boy crying A. Because i stabbed his family

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Sidney was a man, but not just any man... He was a fishmonger.

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A black man walks into a store. As he leaves, the detector goes off. It turns out the sales clerk had forgotten to take out one of the tags on his purchase. The sales clerk promptly took it off, and the man left to enjoy the rest of his day.

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Why could the kid not finish his homework? Because it flew out the window on the way to his parents funeral

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I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

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Your so gay, that you like men!

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How do you make a dog hate you for the rest of its life? Steal its bone and beheaded it.

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Whats worse than being bored, Being you.

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"Hey baby, did it hurt when you fell from up there?" "Waaaaaaahhhhh..." "Ok, let me kiss it better."

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What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill jail brake

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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