What did the polar bear say to the penguin? What are you doing here?

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There were two friends, a girl and a boy. The girl had a ribbon tied to her neck, and every day the boy asked her why, yet she'd never tell him. They grew up together, and fell in love and still, she wouldn't tell him why she had the ribbon on her neck. They got married, and grew old, and still she wouldn't tell him. But one day, she said to him 'I'll show you why I keep this on my neck' and she took it off and her head fell off.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

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A: u wanna die? B: does anyone really wanna die, i mean logistically, un-less u are suicidal, why would you wanna die? A: I do wanna die. B: ur a freak and you should consider getting help person A never got help, on his way to getting help at a certified physician he got hit by a bus, his body can be found at the intersection of church ave. and flatbush. And i would say rest in piece but cars drive over him daily, and thats not to peaceful

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HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

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Why did the black man get arrested? He sold cocaine.

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Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

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on a scale from 0 to 100, how childish are you? 69

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I once did __________ (went to Hawaii, drank a whole gallon of beer, etc. ), but then I woke up. Works with anything, and people will laugh.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

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What did the mexican say to the black person? Hey there! How are you today?

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a blind-deaf-mute.

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Why did the booger throw a fit? Because it was getting picked on.

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Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

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What do you call a man running away from the bus? A man

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What do you get when you cross Michael Jackson? A collision, if Michael Jackson were alive.

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What do you call a plane in shining armor? A knight flight.

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Why did the man die? He was old.

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a man was hired for a job. he made a lot of money and was able to support his family.

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One,two,skip a few... five,six,seven,eight...(and so on ad infinitum)

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Q:What do you find in the middle of a pile of dead babies? A:Another dead baby!

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Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

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Q:Whats big, red and eats rocks? A: A big red rock eater

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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